What I find is that people either love or hate valentines day. There are the people who are in love and expecting a gift or gesture from a loved one. Or the people who are on their own and feel lonely and depressed. There are also the people who are in difficult relationships that dread the day because they know they are going to have an argument or they will simply receive nothing from the person they share their life with.
One of my favourite memories for valentines day has to be when I spent it with my friend who had terminal cancer. It was his last valentines day and because he was single and I had been for a long time we didn't even realise it was that day. He had asked me to drive him to Skipton to get a special walking stick that was made from the branch of a tree. The stick was all one and in different shapes and carved to keep the natural look. When I got to his house he told me that I wasn't going in my clapped out car, I was driving his Jag. So off we set and what a day it was, we had a lovely drive, getting lost because his memory wasn't what it was and we ended up in his lovely Jag on a housing estate where the speed limit was 20mph. Anyway, after our day out he took me to a restaurant and we walked in and asked for a table for two. After a few odd looks as I was in my 30's and my friend was in his 60's we were taken to a table and we quickly realised that it was valentines day and the staff thought we were a couple. It was the loveliest time I have ever had, and every time the waitress came over I touched my friends hand over the table and made comments so she thought that he was my partner. When we got outside we laughed so much in the car especially as he had taken his ex in there who was a similar age to him, and it looked to the staff that he now had a younger model. It was one of those things you had to be there to see. I wasn't long after that he got taken into hospital and passed away, but of course he still bobs in to see me from time to time now. But for me that has to be one of my most enjoyable valentines days I've had so far.
Let me explain about my past relationships also, that my first main relationship was a difficult one and I never knew what to expect on valentines day. It was always a stressful time of the year for me so I can appreciate that for some people who find it difficult. Having moved on from all that it seems strange to me that I put up with that kind of behaviour. I am at a place in my life where I am so comfortable with who I am that I use valentines day as a celebration of love rather than a lovers day. This is something I urge people who are single to do, to celebrate the day by pampering themselves and celebrating who they are.
This year valentines day coincides with lent and as I am currently going to Church and getting back to my Christian routes I will be attending a service at the vicarage for Ash Wednesday and a meal after. I am going to give up eating animal products for lent and being vegetarian already this means that my vegan journey is going to be restarted once again. I plan to come home and treat myself to a long bath and just spend some time doing the things I love doing.
The point of this blog is to make you think about this day and not to be depressed or worry about it if you are single. Just enjoy it and use it as an opportunity to treat yourself. There is nothing wrong with treating yourself to flowers, or even booking a movie or buying yourself a present. Maybe even spend the day with single friends make an arrangement to do something in a group to celebrate the love of friendship.
If you are in a relationship and dreading the day then maybe have a rethink about where you are and what you should be putting up with. My motto is that I would rather be single than putting up with a bad relationship.
All my love to you who is reading this Suzi aka WarriorChick13 xxx xxx x xxx xxx